As men, a lot of us struggle with asking for help. I don’t know where it comes from culturally, but as men, we often feel like we’ve got to handle everything on our own. “I’ll do it myself, I don’t need anyone else,” or maybe there’s this expectation that we should be able to handle it all solo. But here’s the thing—when we don’t ask for help when we actually need it, it can hurt us in the long run.
I’ve worked with clients who struggle with delegating tasks, and it creates this cycle where they take on too much, adding stress, anxiety, and eventually not performing at the level they want to. Sometimes, simply asking for help can break that cycle and keep things running smoothly. There’s nothing wrong with recognizing that your plate is full and you need assistance. Whether it’s work, personal projects, or anything else, asking for help doesn’t make you less capable—it makes you more efficient.
Another area this comes up is with health. I’m in California right now, visiting a friend who had surgery. His wife works, and he can’t get around very well. He asked me to come out and help him out. There are men who would insist on doing it themselves and risk making things worse. But asking for help is sometimes crucial, and in this case, it’s preventing further injury.
Here’s the part we sometimes forget—people want to help. Whether its friend’s family, or colleagues, most people feel good about lending a hand. It gives them a sense of purpose and makes them feel appreciated. So when we ask for help, we’re not just benefiting ourselves—we’re offering someone else the opportunity to do something meaningful too. Now, if you’re one of those guys who really resists asking for help, I’d ask you to reflect on something: a lot of this mindset can come from our childhood. Maybe we didn’t get the help we needed as kids, or maybe we were shamed for asking.
If you were made to feel like you were stupid for needing help that experience can stick with you. It creates a belief—”I have to do it on my own,” or “I’m not good enough.” These beliefs turn into behaviors, and we carry them into adulthood, even when they’re not serving us anymore. The key here is to change that behavior. It’s okay to ask for help. You’re worth it. You’re valuable. And if someone can’t help, it’s no big deal—just ask someone else. So, that’s something to think about today, men. I hope you’re having a great day. I’ll talk to you again soon. Todd from Empowered Men Coaching. Ciao.
Author: Todd Gorishek
Todd is a certified Men’s Life Coach, an entrepreneur, a licensed healthcare professional, a husband, a father, and a world traveler. His mission is to co-create a strong and compassionate world by facilitating transformation through understanding, trust, and empowerment.
He received his professional Life Coaching education from Newfield Network, a certified Life Coach training school, and is a member of the International Coach Federation.