With the holidays soon rolling in our way, it is important to begin thinking about boundaries. Are you prepared to put boundaries in place that will allow you to meet your relationship, finance, and work-life balance goals?

Boundaries are the guard rails that protect what is important to you, and a means to keep yourself moving toward what you want in life, instead of spending time, energy, and money sabotaging yourself and your efforts.

NO is Fundamental

Being able to use the word NO is fundamental in being able to maintain healthy boundaries. How good are you at using it?

There are different ways you can say no.

Thank you for asking me, and no, I won’t be able to do it.
No, that is outside of my budget.
My schedule is completely full now, so no.
I am already committed, I have to say no.

You may think it is better to say no with out saying no…something like “I would love to but I am supposed to go to X.”  or  “That is a great idea, I just don’t know how I can do it.” Does this sound familiar?

NO Creates Clarity

When you don’t actually use the word no, what often happens next? Does the other person push, give reasons why you should, or even…gasp…assume you said yes?

The problem with not using the word no, is your boundary hasn’t been clearly made. It feels like there is wiggle room, an opportunity, and way to make it happen.

Saying no puts your stake in the ground. Others can push against it, but you have closed the gap, eliminated the ambiguity, and removed the uncertainty of your position. That becomes a powerful tool to maintain your boundaries.

Boundaries in Place

What boundaries do you want in place this holiday season?

Think about the different settings you will find yourself in at work, with family, and with friends, Think about your time and your money. How will you allocate it?

Identify your specific boundaries now, and imagine yourself saying no when when someone wants to push beyond them. How will you do it so your response clearly contains the word no?


Author: Todd Gorishek

Todd is a certified Men’s Life Coach, an entrepreneur, a licensed healthcare professional, a husband, a father, and a world traveler. His mission is to co-create a strong and compassionate world by facilitating transformation through understanding, trust, and empowerment.

He received his professional Life Coaching education from Newfield Network, a certified Life Coach training school, and is a member of the International Coach Federation.