I was having a conversation with a friend this week, and I shared how tired I was at the end of March. I told him that I was so tired, in fact, that I ended up just chilling out for the entire day on Sunday and part of Monday. It was kind of weird for me.
His response was, “It’s a good tired!”
As I reflected, I agreed that overall it was a good tired. I had achieved all the goals I set for March. I had worked very hard to do it, and that was very satisfying.
Yet, there was an element of mental or emotional exhaustion present. I really felt it on Sunday and Monday when I was allowing myself to decompress from the March push. It didn’t feel good to me. So, even though I did accomplish all I wanted to achieve in March, why was I so mentally and emotionally spent?
Why wasn’t I feeling the effects of the “good” tired?
Before I go further, let me give some definitions of good and bad tired.
Good tired: Term used when someone feels a sense of accomplishment, satisfaction, or fulfillment after engaging in an activity, completing a task, or having a productive day. In this state, a person might feel physically tired but mentally satisfied, which can be rewarding and even rejuvenating. People often associate good tiredness with having expended their energy on worthwhile endeavors, such as exercising, working on a project, or spending quality time with loved ones.
Bad tired: Refers to a state of exhaustion or weariness that stems from negative experiences or situations. This type of tiredness often involves both physical and mental fatigue, and can be caused by stress, anxiety, boredom, or feeling unfulfilled in one’s daily activities. When someone is “bad tired,” they may not have a sense of accomplishment or satisfaction, and might feel drained or frustrated.
These definitions got me thinking. I experienced both good and bad tired during the month of March, and this is why I was experiencing a mental fatigue (bad tired) that was clouding my mental satisfaction (good tired).
Why does this matter?
When you are setting goals, taking action, and achieving results, it takes a lot of work. At the end of the day, if you feel less than satisfied, or mentally/emotionally drained, it’s logical to ask. “Is it worth it?”, or “Is this really what I want to be doing?”
I don’t think those are the first questions to ask, however.
A better question to ask is, “Are there some “bad tired” activities at play clouding my “good tired” feelings around my goal?” This question helps you find clarity on the feelings you have from pursuing your goal, and feelings you may be experiencing that aren’t related to the goal at all.
This was the case with me.
I have had some health concerns hanging over my head during the whole month of March. Lots of things that need more clarity and certainty. I wasn’t focusing on them; I was focused on my goals, but I realized I was carrying the anxiety and stress with me all the same.
It wasn’t until I finished an active pursuit of my goals for the month, and allowed myself to relax, that I then felt the anxiety and stress I had been unconsciously ignoring.
What I had accomplished made me tired…in a good way. The goals were sound. I was on the right path for me doing the right things. There was no need to question my goals or the direction I was choosing to go.
When I was able to recognize the unconscious stress of my health concerns and the “bad tired” that it created, I could better access the mental satisfaction of having achieved my goals, and reaffirm that my goals are sound.
So, when you are feeling a “bad tired” effect after working and achieving your goals, check in with yourself and ask is it the goal or is it something else that is having this effect on me? Being clear on that will help increase your resolve around achieving your goal, and allow you an opportunity to address the issues that lead to “bad tired”.
Next email, I will share activities that will help you stay in the “good tired” lane, and also activities that will help you not get off ramped into the “bad tired” arena.
Until then, thank you for being a part of my passion and mission that as men, we show up, be present, and push ourselves toward living our fullest potential.
Author: Todd Gorishek
Todd is a certified Men’s Life Coach, an entrepreneur, a licensed healthcare professional, a husband, a father, and a world traveler. His mission is to co-create a strong and compassionate world by facilitating transformation through understanding, trust, and empowerment.
He received his professional Life Coaching education from Newfield Network, a certified Life Coach training school, and is a member of the International Coach Federation.