Today, I want to talk to you about the importance of reframing those false beliefs—those limiting or sabotaging beliefs that get in your way. You know, the ones that trip you up and cause you problems. We’ve all got them, right?
Here’s the thing: these beliefs need to be dealt with early. It’s better to handle them when you’re in your 20s, 30s, or 40s because if you don’t, they’ll still be with you when you’re 50, 60, or even 70. Trust me, I’ve seen it. I’ve got friends who still deal with the same triggers, and I’ve been through it myself. The difference now? I can recognize it. I’ve got tools to handle it, and I don’t let it mess me up anymore. But it’s been a long road.
If you think you can magically change everything by switching jobs, moving to a new place, or finding a different partner, you’re wrong. It’s not about where you are; it’s about you. Wherever you go, there you are. The real issue is the belief you carry about yourself. It’s those beliefs that need to be dealt with, so you’re walking around with beliefs that actually support you in becoming your best self, achieving your goals, and moving forward in life.
If you’re walking around with beliefs like “I don’t matter,” “I’m not important,” “I’m not desirable,” or “I’m stupid,” those are limiting beliefs—and they’re false. A big part of the work I do with men is about challenging those beliefs. We look at them, break them down, and figure out what’s really true.
Everything that happens in our life is just data. It’s neutral. It doesn’t have an opinion or judgment until we add one. We put our own story on it to make sense of things. When we’re young and don’t have the power to control our circumstances, we create stories about ourselves to explain why things happen. As kids, we don’t have the emotional maturity to figure out that it’s not about us, so we create survival mechanisms. Those mechanisms usually either reinforce the false belief or fight against it. But both can become extreme, and they don’t serve us as adults.
As grown men, we now have power. We can say yes, we can say no, we can choose. But those old triggers from childhood can still pop up and make us react like we’re 10 years old again. I’ve been there, so I get it. The way through this is understanding who you are now—the power you have—and looking back at where that false belief came from. You need to understand the truth about yourself: you’re creative, smart, funny, adventurous—whatever it is for you. And from that place of truth, ask yourself, “What can I do now that I couldn’t do before under that old belief?”
That’s the path forward. If you’re working on this stuff in your 30s, great! It’ll still show up at 40 or 50, but you’ll handle it so much better because you’ll have more experience and more tools. You’ll see it coming, and it won’t throw your life into chaos anymore.
At the end of the day, it’s about doing the work to be your best self, creating the best life for yourself and the people you care about. So here’s something to think about: What belief are you working under right now? Does it support the life you want, or is it sabotaging you?
Leave your comments below, men. I’d love to hear your thoughts. What false beliefs have you discovered and overcome? How did you do it? And don’t forget to subscribe. I’m Todd with Empowered Man Coaching, and I’ll talk to you again soon. Ciao.
Author: Todd Gorishek
Todd is a certified Men’s Life Coach, an entrepreneur, a licensed healthcare professional, a husband, a father, and a world traveler. His mission is to co-create a strong and compassionate world by facilitating transformation through understanding, trust, and empowerment.
He received his professional Life Coaching education from Newfield Network, a certified Life Coach training school, and is a member of the International Coach Federation.